OK, I have a lot of stuff to announce that you all are definitely going to want to know about. Before I get to those announcements, though, here is a snippet of a phone conversation I had earlier today:
When telemarketers call my house, they are in for a real treat. I used to watch the show Crank Yankers, where people would make funny crank calls, and while I don’t do that, when people call me at home, I fee like it’s fair game!
Telemarketer: Hello there, my name is Rob…
Me: Hellooo Raub, How r you? (I said in a very thick Russian accent)
Rob: I’m good thanks. I’m calling on behalf of the Nevada police department and we were trying to…
Me: Police? No, I no want trouble. Is police for me?
Rob: No sir, I’m calling on behalf of the police…
Me: Maybe my son? He is in trouble again? Marcooooo!!! Where are you? You drink in the park again? Mr. Rob, Marco is in trouble? He is bad boy again?
Rob: No, no, no sir, your son is not in trouble, you are not in trouble.
Me: If he did bad things again don’t worry I fix him good. Marcoooo!!! Come here? What you did boy? Bring me my broom so I can fix you!
Rob: Sir, your son is not in trouble. I’m calling on behalf of officers who have been hurt in the line of duty.
Me: No, my son he don’t shoot the police. He shoot the police? Marcooo!!!
Rob: Sir, this has nothing to do with your son. We are accepted donations on behalf of the Nevada police.
Me: OK, you want money, yes?
Rob: Well, not exactly, we are accepting donations on behalf of fallen officers and were hoping that we could send you a package and then have you send a donation.
Me: I am no rich man. You know, I work hard, 38 hours a day you know, work wit my hands to make bricks and put on the wall all day. Is hot here, you know?
Rob: We understand that sir, and we have individual donations for as little as $20. If we could have your address we could send out a package.
Me: Ok, ok, so I can think about yes? I don’t pay right now. I maybe make some money this week in working and see.
Rob: Ok sir, fantastic, so if I could just have your name sir.
Me: Is Vladimir.
Rob: Could you spell that please?
Me: Yes. V iel
Rob: I’m sorry what was that?
Me: V like in Victor but my name is no Victor ok?
Rob: Ok.
Me: V L A D I M I R
Rob: And the last name?
Me: Krutov: K R U T O V
Rob: Ok just to verify that’s Vlarirmore Kersuv?
Me: Yes, correct.
Rob: Spelt V L A V I V M O R K E R S O I V
Me: Yes, perfect- you good boy.
Rob: Ok and your address please?
Me: I live in 4100 Snake Shorts.
Rob: 4100 Snake Shorts?
Me: No! I said 4100 Spring River!
Rob: 4100 Spring River then?
Me: You say sprint or spring? I say spring.
Rob: Ok sir, this phone call is being monitored so if you could just confirm that you are committed to sending at least a $15 donation we can send that out to you right away.
Me: No, no, my wife is no here. She know business. She is speak better English than for me. If I do and she don’t know she kill me. She is strong like bull.
Rob: Ok sir, but can we confirm that you will send the donation?
Me: Maybe is better you call later. My wife she is still work in the shop. She come home may 2:00am and I talk wis her. If she say ok, if she say no, then is no. She can eat me you know?
Rob: Ok sir, we’ll send that out right away. Thank you for your time.
Me: Thank you. Marco is good boy but sometime do bad things you know. Please don’t take him.
Rob: Ok sir, no problem.
Me: Ok, bye bye, and be a good boy ok?
I do this kind of thing all the time and I get a big kick out of it. I actually get excited when I see telemarketers call the house, it helps me practice my shtick, lol. I put in on speakerphone so Lori could here, and she almost choked on her dinner, lol.
Ok, enough about that. Right now I’m getting ready to head out with the boys. Then tomorrow, I’m flying to LA for the day for a charity poker event.
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Now here is the truly exciting news. I am so thrilled with FCP’s decision to affiliate themselves with the OnGame network, and the following promotion is something I’m very excited about. So without further adieu, here are the details:
FCP Presents: The Poker Classic
Full Contact Poker players have the opportunity to participate in the Largest Online Poker Tournament In History.
The Ongame Network Poker Classic is a tournament with a record-breaking guaranteed prize pool of $5 million and at least $1 million for the final winner. This will be the largest-ever guaranteed prize for an event that starts online. It is an exclusive event open to Full Contact Poker players.
*Look for special FCP qualifying opportunities and a unique FCP exclusive bonus prize package to be announced soon.
Sit & Go and Scheduled tournament-based qualifiers start on Monday, March 27th. Players can proceed through various levels which start at $1
www.fullcontactpoker.com for the FCP forum regulars every Wednesday night at 9:00pm EST. It’s a $10+1 buy in tournament and FCP adds $100 to the prize pool each week. Also, when I play I add a bounty to my head that equals $1 per entry. So, if 121 players enter, the bounty on my head would be $121. In this case, there were 133 entrants. Early on I was dealt Aces and played a heads up pot with “seacucumber0.” The flop came A-8-9. The turn was a 5, and *sigh* I needed the board to pair, doh! It didn’t, and ‘Pocket3s” dusted me off to win the bounty of $133. It’s a fun little tournament they run. They actually have a leader board based on a sophisticated point system that carries over for the whole year. Anyone can enter, so if you want in you can find all the details at www.negreanuopen.com. *************************************************************** So since I busted out there, I decided to veg and watch some TV. I heard about a new show called Unan1mous on FOX that was supposed to be pretty good. The concept has 9 perfect strangers locked away in a sealed off room underground. They have ZERO human contact with anyone but themselves. There is $1,500,000 on the line, but here is the catch: no one can leave the room until there is a Unanimous vote as to who should get ALL the money! There is actually a professional poker player on the show named Adam, who frankly, comes off a little sleazy I think. Then, they have this black woman on their who calls herself a minister. She is horrible. Horribly mean and preachy. It’s funny, because I just finished watching a 10 minute sermon by “Pastor Rob” which I ordered off of www.nooma.com called “Bull Horn.” In it, you see this chubby dude with a megaphone going out on the streets yelling out to people, “REPENT! YOU WILL GO TO HELL IF YOU DON’T.” Naturally, nobody stopped to listen to what this guy had to say. Pastor Rob goes on to explain, “Put the Bull Horn down. It doesn’t seem to be working out so well.” Basically, he is echoing the sentiment that I share with most people in this world. Nobody wants to be yelled at like that. Anyway, this woman was chastising Rich, a 38 year old gay man, letting him know that he was going to hell and that God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve. How hurtful? SHE is a minister? SHE is supposed to be representing Christ? She was rude, condescending, preachy, and all things people in this world despise. Who does she think she is to tell Rich that he is going to hell? What about her sins? Last time I checked, there was also a verse in the Bible that said, “Thou shall not Judge.” When someone yells out their beliefs in a mocking tone, they turn the world off. I feel sorry for this woman, because I just don’t think she gets it. Yelling at Rich with, “YOU ARE A SINNER AND YOU ARE GOING TO HELL,” is not the way you are going to bring people to God. It was so frustrating for me to watch. Women like her really do give Christianity a bad name and it doesn’t surprise me why so many people are turned off by it. Nothing gets me angrier than gay bashing, racism, or Bull Horn Christians who think it’s their God given right to scold others for what they are doing wrong. People: look within yourselves. Worry about your own walk with God before you cast out judgments on others. Anyway, this woman isn’t going to get the money, that much I can all but guarantee. As for Rich, he seems like a good person in every way. He’s obviously hurt and offended by what the black lady said to him- and I don’t blame him. *************************************************************** I’m taking a day off from poker today. I’m a little tired after getting home at 9:00am this morning. Tomorrow, I have to do a voice over for that poker movie “Lucky You” over on the east side of town at 12:15pm tomorrow. Then at 2:00pm PST I’m doing an ESPN chat. Hopefully I’ll be fresh enough to head back to Bellagio to put in a solid session. The next day, the WSOP Advisory Board is meeting once again to discuss issues dealing with the upcoming WSOP. This will be our second meeting and we plan on covering a wide variety of topics. The most pressing topic for me is maintaining the integrity of the WSOP by making sure that it doesn’t become the WSOH. Other than putting in some hours at the tables, Brennan and Rob, the guys who won the first ever Amazing Race are coming to town so we’ll likely paint the town one night. Then, it’s back to tournament poker. Off to Reno for the WPT event there. Then, off to Toronto to be a part of the Tournament of Champions that is being run by the Red Hot Poker Tour . I’ll only be in Toronto for a day or two before flying to England to represent Canada in the World Cup of Poker. A fun format pitting 16 countries against each other. Each country will be represented by two professionals and one professional soccer player. Team Canada will be myself, Evelyn Ng, and Jason de Vos. Our first round match is against Australia which is led by the infamous Tony G. Oy! Oy! Oy! In Canada we have a different cheer that goes something like this: “Na na na na, na na na na, hey, hey, hey… good bye!” 🙂 It should be fun. From England we fly back to Foxwoods, then back to Vegas in time to gear up for the WPT Championships. I
Two across (4-5)
Three across (6-7-8)
Four across (9-10)
Paint (J-Q-K)
A lot of players use squeezing to randomize their bluffs. For example, let’s say you were playing 2-7 triple draw and drawing to 2-3-4-5. On the river, you look at the side of your card and see that there are three visible pip, or
Yesterday I played a little more online poker and continued to run poorly. I started out ahead about $20,000, but that quickly turned. Some highlight stats:
I had AA seven times, losing five, my opponent folded on the button once, and I won the other one.
My opponent showed AA four times. On each occasion I had: JJ QQ JJ KK! I lost all four.
I lost with top set three times:
AA vs 9-10… board: A K J/ 4/ Q
99 vs Kd-3s… board 9s 3c 4s/ 10s/ Qs
JJ vs K-8… board J 7 5/ 6/ 8
The hand that finally made me give it up after being $70,000 loser was:
A9 vs Qc Jc… flop Ac 6s 2d/ 10c/ 8c
In every one of these pots we jammed it up on every street.
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So this “morning” when I got up at about 1:30pm I decided to head down to the Bellagio to play some live action poker.
When I got there the game was three handed, $4000-$8000 mixed. The games were:
Limit Hold’em
No Limit Hold’em (1k-2k blinds, 1k ante with a 100k cap)
Omaha H/L
Pot Limit Omaha (1k-2k blinds, with a 100k cap
7 Card Stud
7 Card Stud 8 or better
7 Card Stud Hi-Lo Regular
2-7 Triple Draw
2-7 No Limit Single Draw (1k-2k blinds with a 100k cap)
I probably enjoy this mix of games more than any other. It gives you a wide variety to say the least and also tests overall poker skill. To be on “TV” you wouldn’t need any of these skills, but if you want to be a REAL poker player this is the ONLY place to do it. You can
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I got back from my trip recently, and while I’d like to talk about it, I simply can’t. I can tell you that some crazy things happened on my trip, but that’s about all I can say on the matter. I’m home now, and just loving the fact that I get to sleep in. It feels so good to wake up at 1:00pm and not have anything that HAS to be done right away. I mean, I still have a ton of writing to do as always, but I’m not behind on any of it right now. I should probably be writing right now just to stay ahead, but I’m more interesting in unplugging from the world a little bit and watching TV, playing video games, and goofing off. Last night I met up with E-DOG and we had dinner over at Kona Grill. After that, we went over to his place to shoot some pool for $1000 a game. We were playing 9-ball and we started out with me laying him $1.60 per game, but adjusting 10 cents each time one of us won. That’s a pretty big price to lay, but it’s probably about fair. However, I felt like it would be better to just play the game without laying a price, instead just spotting him a ball and adjusting that after each game. We started with me giving him the 8. When I won, he got the 7,8, and 9. I went on a little run and at one point was spotting him the 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9! That’s almost an impossible situation for me, as all he’d have to do is make any of those balls at any time to win the game. Eventually, after Erick won a few games back we decided to leave the spot at the 8. We played about 15-20 games and I think I ended up winning $100. After that he introduced me to a new show called Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO. It’s a show that is clearly bias towards the liberal side, but it was pretty funny. I would say that I lean towards liberal views, but not in all areas. I wouldn’t consider myself a supporter of the Democrats or the Republicans, but with George Bush being a Republican it sours my take on the Republican party. I don’t think Bush is doing a very good job running this country. Having said that, there is a good chance I’d vote Republican in the next election. Well, I wouldn’t say good, exactly, but I’ll try not to let my anti-Bush bias affect my view of the next candidate. It will be tough, but I feel like I’m pretty good at being “fair.” In fact, I think Dick Cheney is a brilliant man. He comes off like a pompous jerk, but he also seems to be very intelligent. When he debated with Edwards, as “charming” as Edwards was, Cheney ate him up in the debate. I watched all the debates, and thoroughly felt like Kerry destroyed Bush in all of the debates. Had Cheney went up against Kerry, I’m not so sure I would have felt that way. *************************************************************** Anyway, enough politics! I went home and watched about eight episodes of 20/20, a High Stakes Poker, Survivor, Real World, and a Real World/Road Rules Challenge. As much as I’m addicted to 24, I’m not watching this season because I still haven’t caught up yet. Apparently, at the end of last night’s episode they finally ran a Diet Pepsi commercial I shot a few months ago. It’s one of those Jay Mohr commercials, where he is the can’s agent trying to get him into poker. He is seated at a table with me, Scotty Nguyen, and Phil Hellmuth. Phil and Scotty both fold, and I get the can heads up with AA. to make a long story short, the board reads: 10s 10c Js Ac and we get all the money in. I, of course, have Aces full, while the can has a royal flush draw. Well, whaddya know he makes a royal on the end while I make four aces. Kinda like how things went for me on High Stakes Poker! I haven’t even seen the commercial yet, but am looking forward to it. *************************************************************** FCP NEWS: If you want a shot at some free money and are a basketball fan, checkout the Basketball Forum for a chance to win $500 in cash, plus other prizes. All the details are in the forum. Also, four of the ten seats in the Daniel Negreanu Prot
David Chesnoff vs. Dan Harrington (Harrington)
James MacManus vs. Mike Sexton (Sexton) (Sexton)
Josh Arieh vs. Eli Elezra (Arieh) Arieh) (Arieh)
Chris Ferguson vs. Chip Reese (Reese)
Spades Bracket:
Erick Lindgren vs. Huck Seed (Lindgren) (Lindgren) (Lindgren)
Scott Fischman vs. Dee Leong (Fischman)
Mike Caro vs. Amir Vahedi (Vahedi)
Barry Greenstein vs. Tuan Le (Le) (Le)
Hearts Bracket:
Phil Laak vs. T.J. Cloutier (Cloutier)
Greg Raymer vs. Daniel Negreanu (Negreanu) (Negreanu) (Negreanu)
David Grey vs. Carlos Mortensen (Mortensen)
Doyle Brunson vs. Shawn Sheikan (Brunson) (Brunson)
Diamonds Bracket:
Ted Forrest vs. Chad Brown (Forrest) (Forrest) (Forrest)
Paul Phillips vs. Ernie Dureck (Phillips)
Barry Shulman vs. Sammy Farha (Shulman)
Howard Lederer vs. Michael Mizrachi (Mizrachi) (Mizrachi)
Negreanu over Forrest
Lindgren over Arieh
Negreanu over Lindgren]]>